Jasper's Story
by Katie'n'Pluto
Summary: It's just my version of Jasper's life before he became a vampire. Don't worry, Alice lovers, he still falls for her in the end. xD
1. Preface

Preface:

"You wanted to see me, sir?" I asked, as I walked into his darkly lit office, too 6nervous to even draw in an even breath. When I did breathe, my breaths were shallow and jagged, not nearly enough to please my lungs. I was in too much shock to even consider taking deeper breaths, to try and seem composed. I knew that he probably could sense my anxiety, and that is what finally made me compose myself. Embarrassment was a great thing, at that moment. I was shocked that my voice had not cracked while announcing myself. I took little comfort in the fact that it was hard for anyone to be in his presence and not feel the power and control that radiated off him.

He was sitting at his large mahogany desk, scribbling notes onto a piece of paper in front of him. When he heard me, he looked up, his pale eyes absently distant for a second before they seemed to recognize me, and they held a sort of sorrow that I had trouble understanding. We had just won a battle, it was a day of celebration. A slight smile spread across his delicate looking face, contradicting the sadness that captured his eyes. He set the pen aside and leaning back against the matching mahogany chair. "Yes, of course. Come in, Major Whitlock." He motioned for me to leave the doorway. "Sit, sit. Relax, my boy." He flicked one soft hand towards a chair in front of the desk.

I hesitantly moved forward, and sat, keeping my hands tight to my side, more than a little intimidated by him. Who would not be? General Robert E. Lee was a influential, strapping man who, in one glance, could be describe only as extreme. I was fortunate that he seemed to like me, as a person and a soldier. I had only been in the Confederate Army for a year or two, having entered when I was seventeen. I was now nearing nineteen. General Lee had taken me under his wing, teaching me things he knew, and marveling in my natural leadership skills. I had moved higher in the rankings since I had entered, and I was now one of the most known, most respected, majors. Yet, I still fidgeted when faced with the man who was behind all of the Confederate's military. The genius behind most of the plans.

"Jasper, how long have you known me?" his tone was a little pained, I could tell this meeting was not just to talk about the old days.

Yet I went along. "Two years, almost." I said.

"I would say we're pretty good friends. I trust you with my life, as do thousands of other men." He said.

I nodded, slowly, still not quite comprehending what was happening. "Yes, I suppose you could say we were friends." I kept my tone neutral. I was lying. I did not consider him my friend, I considered him my idol. I looked up to him; I wanted to be like him. I wanted to have the respect of my country, the love of them also… Not the fear, as others would want to inflict, had they enough supremacy.

"And friends do other friends favors." He said.

I could only bob my head once more, shortly. I knew it; he wanted me to do something for him. I knew, also, that no matter the task I would certainly do it. Even if it was to jump in the line of fire in front of him.

He nodded this time, in understanding, but kept nodding as he seemed to be wrapped up in his thoughts. He picked up a frame that was on the edge of his desk, facing him, and passed it to me. "That's my niece, Elisabeth. Beauty, isn't she?"

I stared at the image, in a few seconds getting the all the details. A girl, ten or eleven. The photograph behind the thick glass was in black in white ink, of course, but I could tell. Her hair was white, her eyes were white, and her skin was white. All of the made me guess that she had light hair, light eyes, and pale skin. The dress she was wearing came up to her throat at the neckline, and down to her wrists on her arms. The picture cut off at her waist, so that was all I could see. The background was one of those painted one, and it was of a lake. I nodded again.

"Of course, she's a little older than that now. She lives in Atlanta." He informed. "Not completely alone, she lives with a few of the workers. Yes, workers, Jasper. I refuse to call them slaves… Did I ever tell you that my wife is incapable of bearing children?" he asked.

"No, sir, I don't believe you have." I said.

"Jasper, Jasper, please. Robert. Call me Robert." He gave me a short, tight smile. His eyes were still troubled, as he took the picture back from me and stared at it, tracing the outline of the little girl. "Beth's parents, my brother and his wife, died when she was little. In a fire. She was around seven, and she saw it. Her mother, Jane, pushed her out of the house while the flames spread. Then Jane ran to wake up my brother, screaming his name, and then the house just collapsed. Or, that is how Beth remembers it.

"She fainted, and when she woke up she was with us, in Virginia. She is like my own. I think of her as my daughter, not my niece." General Lee sighed, the looked at me. "She… I wonder, Jasper, if you realize what Sherman is doing…"

"Attempting to burn down the South." I said. I was not unaware of the situation at hand, and I was beginning to grasp what General Lee was hinting at. His niece, living in the South, directly in the path that was being burned. I supposed, at once, he wanted me to either move or protect this girl, who was too precious to be lost.

"Not attempting, my boy, he is. He is heading for Atlanta. Where my darling Beth is."

My assumptions were confirmed by those words, but I asked away. "You want me to protect her, sir?"

"Yes. And no. I want you to watch over her, and… Oh, I do not know. Make sure she does not get hurt. And at the first sign of fire in Atlanta, get her out of there. Jasper, I trust my life to thousands of men every day… I would trust her's to no one but you." his voice was soft and full of emotion. I knew he was being sincere.

I was flooded with feelings myself. Honor… pride… and love. I loved the old man. Not in the way that I would love a woman, but in the way I would love a father. He was a great man, and he needed- no, _wanted_- my help. "Of course." I said, with a small smile. This girl would be the center of my attention, I would never be too far away that I could not help her if she needed it. She would be my only focus from now on.

"You will?" he did not sound shocked or hopeful; he sounded like he wanted my pledge to do so, as if my first words were not enough confirmation.

"Yes." I let my smile spread wide across my face, and watched gleefully as a mirrored smile spread on his older, wiser face.

"Major, you are a great man. I admire that." His smile faded a little. "There is a slight condition you need to know about…" he rubbed his neck.

I just raised an eyebrow coolly, waiting.

"She can not know that I sent you. Or that I asked you. She has to be completely unaware. My Beth is stubborn and hotheaded, and she has this idea in her head that she can take on the world if the need to arrives."

"Understood, General. I will do my best."


	2. Chapter One

Chapter One:

Atlanta in the mid-afternoon was stuffy and humid. The air hung low and blanketed the city, thick and wet. The sky was clear of clouds, and the perfect blue that I had missed seeing in Texas. It was warm, not hot, yet the sun burned down on the street, reflecting of the cobblestones as if they were glass. The streets buzzed with activity, as the horses pulled, and people walked, enjoying the glow of the sun. It was a lovely day, and it was great to feel the heat, after dealing with the Virginia weather, which was, at this time in the year, nearly always cold. Especially on the coast.

I had just arrived, I was not even remotely settled, yet I set off anyway. I had to find Miss Lee and make myself known to her, as so I might become a friend to her and not seem like a predictor, instead of a protector. As I friend I would have an excuse to be near her, and an excuse to worry, when the time came. I would also have an enhanced chance of convincing her to leave Atlanta.

She was walking. An afternoon walk, I thought. Maybe she did it everyday. I had to find a way to meet her with out… meeting her. As in, telling her why I was there. I was still wearing my uniform, and I could change into something more suitable and meet her later… No, no. It was better to get it over with. She was walking with what I presumed to be her nanny. She was, as I understood, twelve. She was slim and short, and her back was facing me. Her dress held onto the subtle curves lightly, barely making them noticeable, as if there was not much to be noticed. I assumed she was a late bloomer. And fanciful, as most young girls were.

I was good-looking, and I knew it. I had grown up knowing it. My mother was always complimenting me on my honey-blond hair and tawny eyes. I had a lean body, that was still muscular, and I was tall. I could use that to my advantage with Elisabeth. I could make her think herself in love, or close to it, letting me be around her more then I probably should be, had we just been friends. I would make it clear on my end that I was only a friend, though that could not stop her from liking me.

I "accidentally" crashed into her, purposely causing her to stumble forward into my waiting arms. I steadied her, my hands grasping her arms gently, but still strongly. I knew how to work everything to my advantage. I had been doing it since birth. I oozed charisma and was overly helpful, manipulating the people around me easily into think that what I wanted was what they, too, wanted. It was as if it were a gift, a special power, not a learned accessory to life.

I was more surprised that I had ever been when I was faced with Elisabeth. She was not the twelve year old girl I had expected, but a very beautiful young woman, probably sixteen or seventeen. Her eyes were blue, a dark, compelling blue that shocked me; I had thought them to be lighter, like her uncle's. Her hair was the palest of yellows, almost white, and it shined and swung across her face as she toppled into my arms, escaping slightly from the bind that held it at the nape of her neck. Her features were more profound than in the photo, less round and more angular. A perfectly straight nose, her eyes were deep set and large, her mouth wide. Her lower lip was much larger then her first, the only flaw in her face at all. I did not even consider it a flaw, really, and no one else would, either. It made her look only the more beautiful.

"I am terribly sorry, madam." I said, helping her to stand regularly, smiling apologetically, and faking ignorance to who she was. She reminded me, I now noticed, of an angel. Insipid and beautiful, shockingly so. She looked almost illusory, as if she was some dream that some detailed artist had painted, but never showed to any one, thinking it more precious than anything in the world. She did seem delicate, soft and in need of protection, as if anything would harm her, even the petals of a rose.

"It's quite alright, I assure you, sir." She straightened herself, standing perfectly still. Her voice was soft and sweet, a high pitch that rang happily in my ears, and seemed, even when just talking normally, to sing. It was harmonic, and melodious, all at the same time, more perfection in my eyes. That was what she was, perfection. Everything about her was gorgeous. Her voice, her face, even her smell. She smelled like lilies, I could smell it from where I stood. It wasn't excessive, like some women, it was veiled almost, as if she were trying not to smell as lovely as she did.

Just as I was starting to think that she was too perfect, nothing else would happen to make me almost gasp aloud at her striking beauty, her face spread into a dazzling smile. Not a polite one, like the one on my own face, but a purely happy smile. Her eyes lit up, showing again the happiness I had noted. Again, the colour shocked me. It was barely lighter then the night sky, a thousand times deeper, and sparkling as if her eyes were pools that captured the stars more profoundly then even the dark sky could ever hope to. The dark colour in contrast to her fair skin was remarkable, stunning me even further. "You're in the army, I see." Her voice said, snapping me back.

I nodded. "Yes, miss, I am." I smiled back.

"And a Major, too, I see. I assure you even more, then, sir, that it is quite all right." The respect radiated off her voice, seeping into me as if I was quick sand, and her words were elephants.

"You know ranks, miss?" I knew she would, but my equally impressed tone would not show that.

"Why, yes, sir, I do. My uncle, you see, is in the army, as well." She was being modest. He _was_ the army.

"Would I know him?" I asked, falling into step next to her, as she continued to walk.

She allowed this, graciously handing me her umbrella to hold over her head, as this was expected of a gentleman. Especially one from the South. I did not object, taking it and holding it without complaint. "Possibly." A secretive smile spread across her face, even more stunning then the first smile she had sent towards me.

"Will you perhaps tell me his name?" I raised an eyebrow slightly. She would never have been able to tell that I already knew his name.

"Because you want to know his name, or mine?" she retorted lightly, and even thought the words were shallow, she did not in the least seem vain. She was well aware of her beauty, it was only to be estimated, but she did not seem to flaunt it. She knew how men acted when they were attracted to her, which was also to be anticipated.

"Both, truthfully." I smiled.

"Lee. General Robert E. Lee is his name." she said, making my smile turn into a fake O of respect and recognition.

"_The_ Robert E. Lee?" I asked.

"There only one." she teased, kindly, not harshly.

"Well, the you _must_ be the Elisabeth he kept on about." I smiled warmly.

"You know my uncle?" she was deffinately pleased.

"Yes, ma'am." I nodded. "Very well, too. I'm almost directly bellow him. He gives orders to someone, they pass it one to someone else, then another, and then I."

"Oh, then you must have seen in the past month?"

I nodded. "Yes, of course." I let confusion cloud my face and eyes. "Why do you ask?" I had noted the slight concern in her voice.

"I haven't received a letter for a while, and the last one he sent just begged me to leave Atlanta." She confessed, without probing. "He hasn't written again."

"Well… he's quite fine, I guarantee it. Have you ever considered, madam, doing as he requests?"

"Heavens no!" she exclaimed, eyeing me sharply. "No, no, never." She added, softer. "I could never leave, knowing that I could help here…"

"Help, miss?" I inquired. What was there she could do? She could donate money, but she could do that from anywhere. She was a woman, she could not be in the army herself…

"Nursing, Major. I help by nursing those wounded." She said.

"That is very noble, Miss Lee. I am sure that the men you nurse must be in better health, just seeing you walk in. You are stunning." I smiled.

She blushed, her cheeks immediately glowing scarlet under her pale cheeks. "Thank you, sir. You're very handsome, yourself." She was looking away, colouring deeper with every word.

I shrugged my shoulders. "I'm nothing in comparison to you." that was the most truth I had speaking in our how conversation so far.

She smiled a little smile that she contained and tried to bite back, still not looking at me, still red. Her cheeks resembled a rose's petals now, and I was caught wondering if they felt as soft. They most likely would, it looked that way. "I disagree."

"You're beauty is nothing to your modesty!"

"Please, Major, a different topic. I still have yet to learn your name."

"Jasper. Jasper Whitlock." I said, smiling. She was uncomfortable with the topic of herself. Most women loved themselves more than anything else, especially those who had splendor like Elisabeth's. Though, as I thought about it, I could not remember seeing a woman who looked anything like her, who had such captivating magnificence…

"Jasper." She repeated. "That's lovely." She seemed sincere. "I can see why your mother chose it."

"I like it. Elisabeth is lovely, too."

"It's normal. I would much rather have something as charming as Jasper. Yet, not a male name. Something like… Angelique." She smiled.

"Angelique? It would fit." I said this unthinkingly.

She shrugged. "I'll just have to make due with Elisabeth."

She was so graceful. She danced rather than walked, her step fluid and blending. She glided across the cobblestones, her hand clasped in front of her. She never tripped, like I did quite a few times. She was tiny, at least a head shorter than I. She held herself regally, so still and straight you would think her a queen.

"I think Elisabeth is a wonderful name." I grinned then. "It's an antique."

She laughed, a soft musical laugh. "Yes, I suppose it is. I never considered it that way."

She stopped in front of a large cream-coloured building. "This is where I live." She said softly, smiling. She held out one long fingered, pale, elegant hand.

I handed her the umbrella, quickly absorbing every detail of the house. It was huge, yet not overly ordinate, everything was neat in the yard, the porch was sturdy, yet old. It seemed safe enough, though I highly doubted it could withstand a blaze. "Will I see you again?" I asked, not entirely faking my eagerness.

"I walk everyday at three, if you would like to, you can join me." She smiled hesitantly.

"I shall see you tomorrow, in that case. Good day, Miss Lee." I brushed my lips softly over the smooth alabaster skin of her knuckles, hesitating only a second longer than necessary.

She flushed again. "Good day, Major Whitlock." She replied, before rushing into the house, followed by the brisk woman I had originally thought of as her nanny.

I watched as she entered the house, and saw that she immediately ran to the window, lifting the lace drape to watch me stroll off. I smiled to myself, thinking only of how beautiful she was, how well we seemed to get along…


	3. Chapter Two

Chapter Two:

_February 7__th__, 1864 _

_Dear General Lee,_

_I have met Elisabeth, and I have started to become friends with her. I figured that this, indeed, must help me to get on her good side... I realize how hard it must be for you to not sound worried, but she was asking about you._

_She wants you to write to her, sir. She misses you, and loves you, it is very apparent. Try to sound more delighted to hear from her, she is frightened that you are angry with her for refusing to leave Atlanta._

_The house seems to be holding up, although if you are right about Sherman heading straight for Atlanta, than I am sure it won't be any longer. She seems to be very well locked out for, if you ask me, but I will help as much as possible._

_She doesn't suspect anything, I'm quite sure of that._

_I doubt that she would ever think anything wrong of you, even if she had indeed suspected anything. The way she speaks of you, you would think yourself a god. She respects and loves you more than anyone else. This is apparent in every word she speaks of you._

_Though, General, I was not prepared for her, I think I made quite a good impression when we met yesterday. You made it seem as if she were younger than she is. And that photograph of you that you showed me certainly does not do her justice. She is more beautiful than I ever could have imagined. You must be proud of her._

_She nurses, you know, for the wounded soldiers. She's smart, modest, beautiful, and kind. You have a great reason to think such highly of her. I will do my best to keep her safe, General. Even if it means my life is on the line._

_Sincerely,_

_Jasper Whitlock_

"Miss Lee, it is lovely to see you again." I said, bowing as I met her at her door. I took her hand and brushed a soft kiss along her knuckles again, smiling warmly, before placing it on the inside of my arm, taking her umbrella from her and holding it above her head.

She smiled back. "Thank you, Major Whitlock. The feeling is mutual." She said. "May I—" she paused, but then shook her head.

"No, go on. Now I'm curious." I said, grinning now.

"Well—It's just that, pardon me if I'm being nosy, but… Why you are in Atlanta, anyway, Major…?" she asked.

My smile faded. "Well, I… I'm not entirely certain I should entrust the information with you, but… I do anyway." I smiled again, quickly thinking of a lie to tell her that would seem believable enough. "I am here because General Lee wants me to help with the soldiers here. He thinks that my training could help…" I pushed my shoulders up nonchalantly. I would have to have General Lee send word to the base here, in case Elisabeth decided to check on my word.

"Oh?" She looked even more impressed than she had the afternoon before.

And more beautiful, which I had not thought possible. Her pale hair was tied into a neat not on the nape of her neck, exposing her seraphic face, and her very soft and feminine features, even more. Her lips were painted today, in a soft peach color that really caught my attention to her supple, pretty mouth more than a bright red would have. Her dress was the same color as her dark blue eyes, and made of satin, making her skin look ever softer. She seemed to have dressed trying to look more beautiful. I hoped it was for me.

She blushed when she noticed my staring, her face growing lovelier.

She nodded, looking away from my gaze. "I see." She added to her earlier exclamation. "You must be very talented, then, I suppose."

I ignored her praise. "You're quite bashful, aren't you, my dear?" I asked, as my brow furrowing. I had never met a woman who blushed quite as often as she had, when she had no reason to blush at all. She knew she was dazzling, she had to know, but, when someone complimented her, or simply admired her beauty, she turned red as a rose.

Her color deepened at my words. "Uhm, yes…"

I stopped then, lifting my arm away from her's, in front of a newly built house, whose huge garden was overflowing with wild flowers of all sorts. Roses, both pink and red, violets of the deepest blue, delicate white lilies, strong yellow daisies, purple tulips, standing straight and tall with arrogance at how appealing they knew they were. Yet, all I could see was the face that turned crimson under my gaze. "The color looks lovely against your skin." I murmured, unable to resist reaching my hand up to stroke her cheek with my knuckles gently. Her eyes lifted to mine and held, as she flushed even more. "Elisabeth, how exquisite you are." I sighed; I let my knuckles sweep the soft skin once more.

She took a step back, and arched one eyebrow inquisitively. "Jasper—I mean Major Whitlock—"

"Jasper is fine." I commented.

"Major Whitlock," she insisted. "Unless you plan to court me, I suggest you not touch me again."

She was joking, of course, yet I felt as if I should. Even though courting was so old fashioned. No one courted these days, but she was so elegant and imperial that she deserved special treating. I beamed and returned her arm to mine, lifting the sunshade once more. "No, I suppose not." I agreed.

"Major, how old are you?" she asked, suddenly, taking me by surprise.

"Why?" I questioned.

"I was only wondering."

I knew I should have lied to her and told her the age I had convinced her uncle I was, but I _wanted_ to tell her the truth. "I just turned 18, love." I said.

She stopped walking and stared up at me. "But… That's so young! Surely they—Surely General Lee… What… How… Why are you…" she was at a loss for words, but I understood. How could they, her uncle mostly, allow me to fight when I was so young?

"He doesn't know. They think me older than I am." I explained.

"H-how old is that, may I ask…?" she was taking heavy breaths, her face flushed. I was starting to worry for her health…

"Twenty… Well, turning twenty-two, now…" I said.

Her face started to turn a very sickly color… deep purple, like blackberry jam, or something. Her eyes were bugging from her face, and her hands were clenched into tiny, delicate, white, elegant fists.

"You, Jasper Whitlock, are a shameless liar!" she exclaimed, suddenly, shocking me. I had never seen a woman so angry in my life…

**Sooo tiredddd… -yawn-.**

**Ugghh. This is what I get for putting stuff off for so long. I write this stuff down in a notebook during school, and then I type it up. I've had this chapter written for ages, but I was too lazy to boot up my computer and let my fingers fly.**

**Aw, oh well.**

**I got my dues. I opened the notebook, stretched my fingers, and rubbed my over texted thumbs together… And there, right on the first page of the notebook, lying on my lap… Was a huge freaking spider!**

**Needless to say I freaked and started screaming and had my five year-old brother Rooney chase it with my shoe, and then started crying and yelling at him not to kill it and take an innocent being's life…**

**But it was creepy! Roonster caught him in a pickle jar with air-holes in the cover and I named him Yucky, and I plan on letting him loose in the morning.**

**So… There you go. One of my many five year old acts of being stupid and scared of anything that moves. (:**

**Niiggghtttie night, loves. (:**


	4. Chapter Three

Chapter Three:

_My dear friend,_

_I have written a letter to both Beth and the base there in Atlanta. You're story will check out if she asks. I hate lying to her, but it's the only way to keep her out of harms way. I feel so much more comfort, knowing that I have you looking after her. She is in good hands._

_Yes, I did with hold the information of her beauty from you, but I wasn't aware it mattered much to you. Yes, I realize you are a young man, but, I know that you of all people will be able to control yourself. She is a lady, you are a gentleman. And a Southern gentleman, too. I am certain that you will be courteous and sweet at all times, Jasper. That is you're way._

_I have mentioned in my letter to her that a friend of mine is there in Atlanta, and that she should perhaps talk to them, they are kind and calm. That friend is you. I am sure I will get word back that she has already met you and that you are more amazing._

_Jasper, I will never be able to repay you for this feeling of security for my beloved that I feel knowing that you are there, with her, watching out for her. I can thank you over and over again until my dying day, but that will never be enough. You are setting my mind at ease, and freeing my heart from the hard squeeze of worry._

_I think you again, and I hope to hear from you again soon._

_Goodbye, Jasper,_

_**Robert E. Lee**_

"Are you still cross at me, or may I walk with you?" I asked, leaning against the fence outside of her home, smiling a little as she held her back nimrod face, her face stone set and unemotional.

"Whatever you like, Major Whitlock. I care not what you do." She said.

"Aw, come on, Beth. Beth… Beth…" I said. She cracked a smile. "See, as smile. You're not angry with me. Let's walk, then, shall we?" I held out my arm for her.

She shook her head, but still linked her arm through mine, holding her umbrella today. I guess I didn't care much that she had, although I felt terrible that I had made her irritated with me. "I still think you're way too young to be in the war. Young men like you should be settling down and getting married, not on battlefields, risking your lives…" she said.

"The risk is minimal to me. The push I receive from a defeat pushes me to gain a victory. A victory gives me a feeling of absolute magnificence, and I want to feel that again, so I push myself to win again. The risk is worth that feeling."

"Well, Jasper, I never thought of you as a bard before, but now I believe I might have been wrong." She smiled.

"Oh, me? No. Not a poet, just a man." I smiled back.

"Modest too? But too young to be in the army, and you're beautiful words will not change my mind on that."

"Why does it matter the age? I'm just fighting for the land and people I love."

"So? You shouldn't have to. You're so young, so beautiful. So alive. You shouldn't put your life in danger…"

"And men older than I should?"

"No one should have to. But, especially not you."

"There's no exclusion. I am not more special, more special, then the rest of those men. If they should fight, so should I. My birth isn't of high rank. I'm not a mayor, or a king, or even a count of anything. I am just Jasper Whitlock, farmer and Major in the Confederate army. There are men who are the sons of mayors, men better than I, who are fighting. If they shall, so shall I."

"It makes sense, I suppose. However… I don't know any of those other men besides my uncle. At least, not as well as I know you. And, sadly, I've started to grow quite fond of you. I just keep thinking of you, out there on the field; bleed to death from an untreated wound…"

"But, as you can tell, I'm not out on the field, and possibly won't be for a long time." I stopped walked and turned to face her, taking her hand in mine. "Elisabeth, I… I'm flattered you care enough about me to not want me to risk my life, but that's my life. I live to protect the things I love. Even though I'm very doting of you as well, I'm not going to give it up. Ever."

I had no idea what I had said that. Yes, it was true, but what did truth matter with us anymore? All I did was lie to her. Every other word was a lie. I shouldn't have had a problem with saying I was flattered that she enjoyed my company that much, but that I wasn't that fond of her. That would have made things a lot less complicated.

"You should come to diner tonight." She replied.

**A/N: Right, well, it's 2:09 in the morning, and I still have a few more updates to write, so I'm just going to drop it at this. Okay? Sweet.**

**-Beat Down and Drained Kate**


	5. Chapter Four

I am, decidedly, the worst major in the history of all majors. I was put on an assignment to protect the beloved niece of my general, and I couldn't even do that with out messing it up. Of course, it's not exactly like I had a choice in the matter, is it? I can't help what I feel, it just happens. And, I suppose, it wasn't as it I was putting her in danger by falling in love with Elisabeth. If anything, I was more protective than I had been before, more aware—that could only be a help to my cause, correct?

Oh, I just don't know anymore. This is so confusing. And, I must admit, ironic. My plan to protect her at the beginning had been to get her to fall for me, and it had turned out exactly the opposite. If I wasn't so damn confused, I probably would've found this hilarious. Instead, it annoyed me. I didn't _want_ to be in love with her. I didn't want to be in love period. Who did, these days?

Soldiers honestly should never fall in love. It only makes the whole situation of war more stressful and complicated. Always wondering if you'll ever see her lovely, angelic, faultless, wonderful face again. Hoping that she misses you as much as you miss her. Waiting for the war to be over so you can drop your past life to be with her…

Although, none of that was possible, for me. She would never feel the same towards me, I was certain. She was perfect in everyway, always truthful, so beautiful and caring. I wasn't bad looking, sure, but I was a liar and I was selfish. Everything I did, really, had something to do with me. Get _me_ farther in my army career, things of that sort.

Almost everything I'd said to her since that day, more than a month ago, has been a lie. Of course, I had good reason, in my mind, to lie, but that didn't make it any better. At least, it probably wouldn't if she found out about the lies and half-truths I'd told her. She'd probably never forgive me.

Added, General Lee would have my head if I ever attempted to marry Elisabeth. She was his "little dove", the apple of his eye, and no one, especially me, would ever be good enough for her. Of course, I agreed with that view, and to argue with him over that subject would just make me a hypocrite.

And with all of that said, I must admit to you that I was just slightly upset, more relieved, when I received a letter from General Lee, asking me if I could hold off on Beth's protection for a week or two, to help evacuate a nearby town of women, elders, and youth. I, of course, accepted this task without complaint, and promised it would be done as soon as possible. He replied that he knew he could count on me.

And so, there I was, walking along the cobblestone street that Elisabeth's house was located, my hands in the pockets of my trousers, my shoulders slumped and my head hung, my feet shuffling along the stones. As I reached her house, where she stood outside, an alluring, amazing smile on her face, which promptly changed to a softly concerned frown.

"Jasper?" she asked, holding the hem of her deep purple skirt, and the matching lace-edged petticoat, out of the way as she hurried towards me, down her walkway, pushing the gate open. She rushed too me, looking up at my face, those expressive, gorgeous eyes scanning my own for a moment, before I forlornly looked to the side.

"Jasper," she repeated. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing's _wrong_, per say. At least, I suppose it shouldn't be. I knew I wouldn't be stationed here forever…" It wasn't a lie, but it was leading toward one. More lies, more deception. I just wanted to tell her the truth!

I still avoided her gaze, taking a step back, my frown deepening; it was part of the act, yes, but it wasn't forced at all. I honestly felt like I was tearing my own heart apart by leaving her. She seemed to have become my heart; it was like she was my only reason for life or something. I existed now only to love her. Even if she hadn't a clue.

Her face fell even more then, the concern replaced by an emotion that I hoped was close to mine, but probably wasn't. Most likely, she pitied me. Or, she would miss her friend. She didn't love me in the same way I did. She never would.

"You're leaving?" she asked, her voice softer than it normally was, growing higher in pitch.

I simply nodded.

"Where? Why? For how long? Will you be back?" she tone was panicked, her eyes frantically stared into my own, and I nearly smiled at her worry. At least she cared about me enough to want me to come back, it seemed.

"Huntersville, to escort the citizens out of the town," I said. "Only a week or so, I believe. I'm fairly sure I'll be coming back." I smiled at her.

"When are you leaving?" she asked, the panic now replaced with sadness, it seemed.

"Tomorrow," I replied, starting to walk, looking down at her exquisite face as she followed my suit.

"And you're telling me just now?" she asked, anger flashing in the depths of her eyes.

I shrugged. "I didn't want to worry you or something before I had to. Besides, it'll be easier to say goodbye if I don't stay in the same town as you for a while." It just slipped out. I hadn't meant to say it.

But since I had, I hesitated only a second before adding. "The only reason, honestly, I don't want to leave Atlanta yet is you. I'm going to miss you. Probably more than you realize."

The blush started then, sweeping along her cheekbones, making me smile slightly, admiring the soft pick color as it spread slowly. "I'll miss you too. You'll have to hurry back, Jasper. I just can't picture Atlanta now with out you," she giggled a little, blushing deeper.

I nodded. "Of course I will, for you, darling," I said.

We'd stopped, like we were sometimes prone to do on our walks, when the conversation took all of our focus. We normally didn't notice; we were too wrapped in each other's words. I wouldn't have noticed this time, had I not stared at her long enough to realize that she wasn't moving.

Even that possibly would have escaped my knowledge, had I not leaned down and done something I regretted even before I had done it. I pressed my lips gently to her's, simply taking a step closer to her, wrapping an arm around her slim, stunning waist, the other bent up so that my hand could cup her soft face gently.

I didn't care that I wasn't invited to do something so improper. I didn't care that I was probably setting myself up for her yells. I didn't care about anything. In that moment, for once, I wasn't overanalyzing. I was just doing—acting on a whim. And, even if it only lasted a few seconds, those few seconds made it worth my while. She made it worth my while.


	6. Author's Note an apology, more like

**A/n:**

**Gosh, I'm, like, so sorry for all the typos in that last chapter.**

**I honestly don't even have an excuse. I'm not tired or anything.**

**Bleh.**

**Sorry, again.**

**D:**

**-Katttiiieee[I'm eating sunflower seeds. Yumma. Summer School bite. Trust me.]**


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